Google prison was bad…worse in several ways than the brick and mortar prisonsstill used in the third world. He had stayed on the straight and narrowfor the last 10 years. His last offense on record was when his wife wasstill pregnant with nickie4313@gmail.com.G-prison meant that he had no access to any correspondence as his email account had been suspended. With no contact with the outside world, the walls seemed to close in on him. He felt caged and helpless.The Laundromat (a sister concern of google.com) where he used to work had removed him from the payroll after his paypal (a sister concern of Google.com) account  stopped accepting payments, a definite sign that one had fallen foul of the law. The lack of a gmail login denied him basic amenities such as email accessibility, RSS feeds and Google News. No access to classified ads meant there would be no way of getting hired and the paypal account suspension meant no employer could pay him even if they did hire him.He lay miserably in bed, the misery heightened by the ambient noise inthe room: The wife, snored loudly. Poor victim ofsubliminal advertising. Even her snores sounded like GOOOOOOOooooooo-GLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLE.She would need all the rest she could get before she headed out into the Amazon.com jungle (a sister concern of Google.com) for her day's shopping. Outside, oversized cars sped by on elevated magnetic field strips. Since magnetic cars are silent and hence don't make the requisite amounts of noise, American car manufacturers had taken to covering the whole SUV with high-intensity LEDs to guzzle electricity and bother pedestrians. From across the hall, sounds of robots attending Mrs. Singh's vocal training classes to smooth out their mechanical voices wafted into the room.

Hopefully, tomorrow would be better...tomorrow, he would be eligiblefor his monthly conjugal website visit, albeit only to dirt sites approved by Google. As the Google ads said, it *was* better than the real thing.

He crawled out from under the covers and got dressed and grabbed his laptop to go sit out on the streets. Begging passersby on the street to click on the google-ads on his blog was the only legitimate way for him to buy food for dinner. Still, he thought…it could be worse. In countries where the sharia law is practised, it is said that they cut off a big piece of your bandwidth in public….and abandon you to live alife of pain and buffering….